Can We Talk?

We need to address this. I know that we prefer to move onto the Golden Globes and the government shutdown and how Ellen thinks she speaks for all LGBTQ people, but we need to address this. I know that some people are upset that there hasn't been a Weinstein/Moonves/Lauer documentary yet; that Woody Allen still gets to make the same film over and over again; that the POTUS still gets to preen in front of the world daily; that since Bill Cosby is sitting in jail, this is just another part of the ongoing black feminist agenda to attack Black men. But we need to discuss this.

I am not talking about the documentary. I am not talking about his music. I am not talking about the parents or the money they were paid or the rumors or the ex-wife. I am not talking about that man. I won't even call him by name.

We need to talk about sexual violence in our families. We need to talk about terrible family secrets that destroy young lives. We need to talk about how our children are sexualized too early in life, before they even reach puberty. We need to talk about how our daughters develop bodies that give grown ass men excuses for inappropriate behavior. We need to talk about the kisses and hugs that happen when we are not around. We need to talk about how hurt people go on to hurt other people. We need to talk about why parents should not allow the earning potential of their talented offspring to blind them to real-life danger. We need to talk about why so many people feel more comfortable using social media to tell their stories of trauma.

We need to talk.

We need to talk about an industry that has allowed the exploitation of young girls to become part of its lore (we can call the names, but those are the ones that we know). We need to talk to our children and not assume that our sons are any safer than our daughters. We need to talk about abuse that occurs outside of the home committed by other adults that our children are told to trust. We need to talk to our children so that they know that they can talk to us.

We must not allow this moment to pass with a shrug. We must not argue that a tormented soul should be forgiven for his abusive behavior because of his musical genius. We should demand respect for the victims. We should not be dismissive of their trauma.

We need to talk about these folks who have been downloading more of his music in response to the documentary. We need to talk about those artists who worked with him in the past and have remained silent. We need to talk about the companies that profit from and protect him. We need to talk about the folks on his payroll who have known about his depravity for years. We need to talk about guilty consciences, strange bedfellows, sycophants, and attention-seekers.

We need to do more than express our outrage over social media. We need to do more than delete his catalogue from our playlists. We need to do more than demand that his songs no longer play on the radio. We need to do more than just talk among ourselves.

We need to talk.
We need to talk to our sons.
We need to talk to our daughters.
We need to talk to our sisters and brothers.
We need to talk to our cousins.
We need to talk to our nieces and nephews.
We need to talk to our grandparents.
We need to talk to our aunts and uncles.
We need to talk to our bonus children.
We need to talk to our godchildren.
We need to talk to our parents.
We need to talk in our churches.
We need to talk in our schools.
We need to talk in our organizations.
We need to talk to our friends.
We need to talk to a therapist.
We need to talk, even if it dishonors the dead.
We need to talk, even if it disgraces the living.

I'm here to listen.